Novelty English Macho Man Apron
Can’t get your man into the kitchen? You will if he has this Novelty English Macho Man Apron to wear! No matter how much they protest, men really love these garments and will grab any excuse to wear one. This one will make him look like a lean, mean, iron-pumping machine – and who knows what fun that might encourage over the washing up.
The Novelty English Macho Man Apron depicts a glistening male torso with perfect pecs and amazing abs – absolutely to die for! His trunks portray the union flag, leaving very little to the imagination and his bulging quadriceps are tense with pent up energy.
If that sounds nothing like the man in your life, then why not give both of you a treat with this fun and inexpensive gift? This witty apron is made from 100% polyester and the colours are bright and vibrant just as the epitome of masculinity should be.
Of course he’ll want to wear it straight away, so be sure to lay down the ground rules from the start. These are fairly obvious to any discerning woman: the apron can only be worn during household chores, including cooking, cleaning, washing up, barbeques etc. It can be modelled in front of friends, but only when playing the perfect host. That way your tiny initial investment will reap mega rewards!
Adult Space Hopper
They say when you revisit the past that everything looks smaller; but that is definitely not the case with the Science Museum Giant Retro Adult Space Hopper. He’s grown by 33% since his advent in 1969, to an enormous 80 cm in diameter; making him suitable for adult use. And the bigger the hopper, the better the bounce! In all other respects he looks the same, with his thick rubber orange skin and sporting that instantly recognisable, inane, toothy, kangaroo grin. He also comes equipped with his own foot pump, for quick and easy inflation.
The retro adult space hopper will bring out the child in you whatever your age, whether you are reliving your bouncing past or acquainting yourself with it for the very first time. Space hoppers are the fun way to fitness as they exercise core muscles, trimming away excess flab and improving balance and posture. Learn some exercise moves or just bounce for fun.
As they watch you happily bouncing your way to health, your friends will soon want to follow suit. Remember the first kid in the street to get the latest toy? Well this could be you. You might even get to organise a neighbourhood space hopper race to raise funds for charity or simply for the fun of it. And, of course, when you’re all bounced out, the kids will love to have a go too!
Make Your Own Sex Toys
This naughty but humorous little book can bring out the creative side in you that you never knew existed. With step-by-step, fully-illustrated instructions for fifty sexy little projects on a budget, this is the perfect gift for DIY enthusiasts who enjoy taking matters into their own hands. If your sex life needs a little TLC, this book could be a great investment for yourself or your partner.
‘Make Your Own Sex Toys’ is an inexpensive paperback book divided into three main sections (or should I say sexions?): for him, for her and for couples, each featuring toys to get your sex life back on track – or maybe to send it for a spin in a new direction! There is also a final section offering some ideas for household storage solutions. Intriguing!
From knitted willy warmers to panty pockets; home-made chocolate body paint to sensual shoe boxes, the creative ideas abound on every page. Most of them take very little time, effort or money to make; and the best thing is that very few special materials are needed; in fact you are likely to have almost everything you need lying around the house already, or readily available at the nearest supermarket.
For seasoned DIY sex toy enthusiasts or inexperienced craftsmen, Matt Pagett’s fun-packed book will spice up your sex life in ways you never before imagined. Well, unless you’re already enjoying intercontinental penetration, teledildonics or digital orgasms, that is!
Toilet Mug
If you want to drop a hint that someone’s tea or coffee-making skills need work, then why not do it with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer with this crazy Toilet Mug? Or if you just want to galvanise your colleagues into hysterical laughter, bring out this ceramic shocker for your morning cuppa. The toilet mug is a realistic looking miniature of the genuine thing and the messages it conveys are quite clear.
The Toilet Mug is one of those fun but practical gift ideas for family, friends and colleagues, or just for you when the mood takes you. It holds a generous 336 ml of your favourite brew and comes boxed for presentation. It can’t fail to raise a giggle in the recipient no matter what their preference in beverages.
On the other hand, if the coffee at work tastes like…well…coffee, then the toilet mug can be used for a multitude of other purposes. It can make a real focal point on your desk as a handy container for paper clips or pins; or can be turned into a plant pot – perhaps for a small strategically-shaped cactus; or as a container for pot potpourri, peanuts or sweeties. Use it at home for floating tea lights, or buy a whole set to use as dessert bowls. No canned laughter will be needed when you bring out the trifle or chocolate mousse served in these!
Gentleman’s Ball Scratcher
Just when you thought there wasn’t a novelty toy left on the market that he didn’t possess, we’ve gone that extra yard or so to produce the ultimate executive toy: the Gentleman’s Ball Scratcher. This elegant little tool will lend a helping hand to the man who thinks do-it-yourself is beneath him! If he simply can’t do it himself, the 9 inch handle and tiny hand make this tool the perfect size and shape to reach those secret nooks and crannies that other tools can’t reach.
The Gentleman’s Ball Scratcher comes in the shape of a gracefully-cupped lady’s hand, complete with genteel, feminine fingers, poised and ready to oblige. The instrument is silver-plated for ultra chic. It‘s even dishwasher safe and stain resistant!
Boxed in its own stylish, lined presentation case, this handy little tool makes a sophisticated gift for the man who has it all – including an unspeakable itch. Give it to the man you care about for a bit of gentle fun, or to a colleague to whom you may perhaps want to drop a subtle hint.
The Gentleman’s Ball Scratcher is an inoffensive little gadget that cannot fail to amuse and delight both the giver and receiver. It’s not often you can give so much pleasure for so little, is it?
Juggling Boobs
Now let’s be honest. What guy wouldn’t want to get his hands on this little pair? This set of three Juggling Boobs has to be funniest gift of the year. Made from exquisitely touchy-feely soft latex rubber, these Juggling Boobs also make great stress balls for him to squeeze and fondle when he needs to unwind. He might drive his colleagues to distraction as they watch him, but will he care? He’ll being feeling so laid back, he probably won’t even notice.
Alternatively, why not buy two pairs so he can practise some serious juggling? Each squidgy Juggling Boob measures 7 cm in diameter – a perfect little handful by anyone’s standards! They are also realistically flesh-coloured with convincing nipple detailing for that extra touch of humour. As he builds up his juggling prowess, he can add more himself. He certainly won’t want to handle ordinary juggling balls ever again!
Each set of two comes carefully packaged in an eye-catching, humorous gift box, which makes the sexy Juggling Boobs/Stress Relievers ideal as a stocking filler, a cheeky secret Santa gift or just an anytime present for an overworked friend or colleague. It will be guaranteed to put a big smile on his face when he opens this box. Instant de-stress!
Happy Man Bottle Opener
No wonder this saucy little chap looks so happy – he’s got the perfect tool for the job! The Paladone Happy Man Bottle Opener cannot fail to bring a smile as big as his own to anyone’s face, or raise a real chuckle at any table. His mighty member conceals an opener for beer bottle caps.
This inexpensive novelty bottle opener is an irresistible little gift that will create a very big impact wherever it’s bestowed. Made of brightly-coloured durable plastic, there is absolutely no chance this little treasure will get lost in the back of the kitchen drawer!
Couple him with a bottle of your mate’s favourite beer for a birthday or Christmas gift, or just give him on his own and let his unmistakable asset speak for itself. He’ll be a firm favourite wherever he goes.
If you like the Happy Man Bottle Opener, you might care to know that he is not alone. His friends are the Happy Man Corkscrew and the Happy Man Bottle Stopper – and what giggle-raisers they are! Why not buy the happy trio to make the perfect matching set? No-one can say you are not well-prepared for the party with this hilarious set of colourful kitchen tools.